Chase Fitzgerald, of Toledo, had a question for his mother: Could he get a cellphone?

"I said, 'Absolutely not’," Carla Fitzgerald said, recalling her response to her then nine-year-old.

Some of his fourth-grade friends already had cell phones, he countered - a parry that, while truthful, wasn’t enough to win over his mother. She said she’s sticking with her answer for now as the younger of her two sons looks toward a new year in the fifth grade.

"I will more than likely wait until he gets to junior high school to assess that decision," she said.

It’s a debate that’s familiar to almost any parent of school-age children these days: A cellphone is often an eagerly anticipated milestone for youths, perhaps akin to the keys to the family car at 16. More importantly to their parents, a cellphone is also increasingly viewed as a necessity; it’s a needed means of connection between them and their on-the-go children.

Did they make it home from school OK? Did they make it to football practice? When do they think they’ll need a ride home from tonight’s rehearsal for the school play?

"It’s not like it used to be where there’s a phone around every corner if you have to come home early," Jennifer Naujock, of Toledo, said.

She and her husband have been thinking about it with their oldest, Savannah, who’s 13. They know that many of her friends already had cellphones last year, Naujock said, but they’re still holding off as she heads into eighth grade.

"I understand that aspect of giving that kid the ability to call you whenever they need to," Ms. Naujock continued. While they aren’t quite yet seeing the need, safety-wise, for Savannah, she said, "it could be we’re getting to that point."

While there’s no consensus on the right age for a youth to receive a cellphone of their own - experts say it should depend on the child and on the circumstances - there’s also no denying that youth are increasingly carrying them; preteens and teens who try to negotiate for one by reasoning that all their friends have one likely aren’t stretching the truth.

Just over half of US children have their own smartphone by 11, and more than two-thirds do by 12, according to a nationally representative survey of more than 1,600 eight- to 18-year-olds in the United States put out by Common Sense Media in 2019. Among 13- to 14-year-olds, ownership is at 84% - notably up from 67% in 2015.

Those numbers are in line with what Heather Baker sees at Toledo Public Schools, where district policies address only appropriate usage of cellphones; they leave it up to teachers to set classroom policies on whether or when a student can use one during the school day.

The executive director of student intervention and support said that cellphones are so ubiquitous by high school that tech-savvy teachers sometimes work them into classroom activities, perhaps encouraging students to pull up an article and read along on their own screens.

"You usually don’t run into a [high school] student that doesn’t have one," she said.

"We do see them more often now in our sixth, seventh and eighth grades," she continued, "and you’ll even see some younger than that. But we don’t see that often... You wouldn’t see it as part of a curriculum activity, because it’s not as frequent in our elementary grades."

Derek Lee is a licensed professional clinical counselor with a supervising designation; he’s also the CEO of Perrysburg Counseling Services. While he said he doesn’t think there’s a definitive when a child is ready for the responsibility of a cellphone, he recommended that parents considering the question give the most weight to the needs of their family.

"It shouldn’t be out of convenience," he said. "It really should be out of need."

"Maybe [a child] is at a music camp in the morning and in the afternoon, they’re at a soccer camp," he said, offering an example. "If there is a need for contact, that’s when I think we start to derive a need to share technology with them."

But he stressed that any parent that supplies their child a cellphone should invest in time and energy to ensure that they use it safely. It means ongoing conversations about Internet safety, as well as check-ins so a parent knows what the child is doing on their screen.

"Any time we’re talking preteen, I think there’s far more danger than benefit," he said.

"I’m not saying you can’t [get a preteen a cellphone]," he clarified. "I’m saying as the danger increases, your diligence and your workload has to increase. You have to be more aware of what they’re doing. You have to review what they’re doing more."

Fitzgerald knows what that’s like. She regularly keeps tabs on her older son, Christian, 16, who’s had a cellphone since he was in the fifth grade. He’s a rising junior.

"I definitely think that you should periodically monitor your child’s activity with these devices," she said. She plans to do the same when it’s her younger son’s turn for a cellphone.

If a phone could only be used to place a call to Mom or Dad, like some specialised models geared toward young children, it would perhaps be a less fraught decision. But with the ubiquity of smartphones, a phone these days presents far more opportunities - opportunities for danger, certainly, but also garden-variety distractions.

Parents like Fitzgerald and Naujock are thinking about that, too, they said, as they consider their children’s circumstances.They know a phone comes with a barrage of attention-pulling opportunities to scroll social social media feeds, send messages and play games.

Some parents, like Gary Harmon, suspect their kids aren’t quite yet ready to resist.

He’s the father of 12-year-old triplets - Hailey, Nolan and Jayden - in Richfield Township. He said his preteens have access to a shared cellphone. They can take it when they need it, perhaps tossing it in a gym bag when they’re headed to cross country practice; but their father said they know to return it to the kitchen counter when they’re done with it.

While they’d love to have their devices - and give him plenty of grief about it, he added; he knows they have friends with phones - he doesn’t see a need quite yet.

Ask him again in a couple years.

"I’m thinking maybe freshman year," he said.

 - Tribune News Service